The Letter
by hythros
Summary: A mysterious letter, an angry husband chasing them through time and space and lots of trouble. In short: Just another day for River and the Doctor.


**Disclaimer : I do not own Doctor Who or any of the mentioned characters or creatures. I do own the Hujikun bazooka though. From which not even I know what it is. But who cares, eh?**

* * *

 _For you. Because at least this once, I want to keep my promises. And even though I know it can never make up for the countless times I screwed up and probably will screw up in the future, I hope it can bring that wonderful smile up your face._

 _And I would tell you so much more, but all of that you already know._

* * *

The letter

River stepped back and admired her work. Three hundred sixty five. That was another year she had spent in her cell in Stormcage now. Or well, counted in Earth days. But River quite liked to keep that habit. It had a nice ring to it. 8 7 66 hours. 365 days. One year. And every single day of it marked by a carved line in the hard granite wall of her tiny cell.

Well, most of the year anyway. Where she spent her nights was still up to her. River mused and put her little laser pen back into her pocket.

She turned to the tinged mirror and checked her lipstick. Then she puffed her wild curls. Would he notice?

Oh, who was she kidding? Of course he wouldn't.

He didn't care about things like that. Anniversaries and holidays, well he did happen to pop up on Christmases, but what does time mean for an out of time existing time traveller?

What did he care it was her birthday today?

* * *

But then suddenly, as if on cue, a soft mechanical moaning sounded through her cell and River could feel a soft breeze tickle her skin. She smiled.

There he was. The most extraordinary man in all of time and space, and he was coming for her.

River's heart tried for an excited jump as she spun around. She ran up to the tall police box and stroke her hands over the dark blue wood of the door. The most beautiful blue in all universes.

"Did you miss me?" As an answer the ancient space ship sent her a soft mental nudge.

River smiled and it felt like a million butterflies were running wild in her lower belly as she pushed the door open… and felt her excitement pop like a rainbow bubble.

* * *

"Ah River, there you are!" The Doctor waved his hand dismissingly. "Would you close the door please? There's a draft."

River lazily lent the door behind her and walked up to him. He wasn't even looking at her.

He was sprawled on the floor, his long legs crossed behind his head. Around him was a mess of crumpled paper balls.

The saddest thing was that she recognised the bow tie he wore, it was the exact same as before. He had just skipped the day ahead from the last time they met.

"What are you doing Doctor?" she asked him as she stopped her way and looked around the mess of paper surrounding them.

He gave her an annoyed look, as if he was just about to give his dry remark, but suddenly his eyes grew wide.

"What are you doing?! Don't look at that!"

Immediately he jumped up and tried to gather all the paper surrounding them in one arm. But of course that idea ended in tears and the Doctor had to bend down to stop all the tiny balls from rolling down his console.

River rolled her eyes and crouched down to stop one of them before it could fall into the heart of the TARDIS, but a high terrified screech made her stop in her movement.

She looked at him with huge eyes. "What happened? What's wrong?"

"You can't touch that!"

"What?" River stared blankly at the little paper ball in her hand. It didn't particularly seem in any way harmful or dangerous.

"Why can't I touch it?" she asked him challenging.

"Because- because- Because, … you can't see what's written on there."

"Why?" River frowned a little while he took the paper ball out of her hand and tossed it onto a little pile next to the console with all others.

"Spoilers." He grinned at her. "Oh I was just waiting to say that!"

River rolled her eyes.

* * *

The ground under the pile opened a small hole and the TARDIS swallowed the entire lot of crumpled paper with a silent gulp.

"Fine. I won't look at it then. But what is it?"

The Doctor gave her a wicked grin and took the last paper, the one he had had been working on, and folded it neatly once in the middle before he stored it securely inside his inner jacket pocket.

"It's a letter" he told her.

River raised her eyebrows. "A letter? For who?"

"For my wife!" he exclaimed excitedly, his eyes sparking up with glee.

River snorted. "I am your wife!"

He turned to her and eyed her with large eyes, all excitement suddenly gone. "Right. Well, River you see…"

River sighed. "I know Doctor." She turned her head away. Of course she knew she wasn't the Doctors only companion during his many travels through space and time.

"Who is it for then?" She eyed him with interest. The Doctor was a man of many mysteries, but River knew for sure that she wasn't the first wife he has ever had. And by the looks of it, she wasn't even the most current.

"I can't tell you that" the Doctor stated pretty matter-of-factly.

River sighed and rolled her eyes. "How many wives have you actually had, Doctor?" She narrowed her eyes a bit.

As an answer he pulled his collar. "Uh, that's hard to say, really. There was Marilyn Monroe that was a mistake. Horrible mistake. Oh and Queen Elizabeth! But that was, urgh, let's not talk about that." He pulled a face and River rolled her eyes.

"Why did you come for me Doctor?" Or was it just to boast about the hundred different wives you have scattered across the stars? What is it today then? A little bit of ginger?

"Well, actually…"

* * *

But he never got to finish his sentence, then all of a sudden a huge impact hit them from the side and the TARDIS console room went black.

"Woah!" River grabbed the railings behind her. "Doctor? What's happening?"

"I must have forgotten to put the shields back up" he rushed over to the console and started pressing some buttons, apparently at random. His face glowed in the faint blueish light of the console.

River sighed and balanced her stand before she quickly walked over to him and adjusted the settings.

No, the thermal demiser has to be switched of. And definitely no temporal randomiser.

River switched the big fiercely blinking button of. The TARDIS gave her a thankful hum. River smiled a bit and patted the console comfortingly, as another impact hit them and threw the entire room to the right.

"Argh!" River tried to cling onto the console. "Doctor! What the heck is going on?!"

"We might be under attack" he admitted a little sheepishly and flipped the lever for the stabilisers. Unfortunately as a result to that the console room started shaking even more violently than before.

"And it looks like they found me!" The Doctor cried out anxiously and gripped the console.

River growled a bit and flipped the switch back. "Attacked by whom?"

"I don't know! They have been following me for almost two lightyears now! I thought I got rid of them when I picked you up, but it looks like they found me again."

"Who are 'they'?"

* * *

But before the Doctor could answer that, the monitor flipped on and revealed the ugly potato face of one big Sontaran. Well, big for Sontaran standards anyway.

"Commander Sho" River sighed.

"You know him?" The Doctor stared at her in disbelieve. Now it was Rivers turn to give him a little sheepish smile. She shrugged.

"As it turns out, yes I do. We… might be married."

"What?!"

River would have laughed at his face if she didn't feel the same disgust towards the brutal Sontaran commander that was now literally written all over his expression.

"Why would you-…?!"

"I had no choice! It was either marrying him or losing three sixth of the Seaorian ruins to their stupid attack!"

"So you decided to marry him?" The Doctor stared at her in disbelieve.

"The Seaorian ruins are in their structure absolutely unique in the universe. No one till this very day has managed to open the black doors that shield most of the tunnel system underneath the ground of the planet. It's an archaeological treasure and landmark for the history of the universe…"

"He's a potato!" the Doctor cut her short. River rolled her eyes.

* * *

"Doctor!" The ugly voice of Commander Sho grunted out. "Return my wife immediately! We know you have her and we are not afraid to use force if you don't agree to hand her back now!"

The Doctor gave her a look. River swayed her hair and pulled her shoulders back. "You can't seriously expect I was going to stay with him in his stupid battle fighter! They have absolutely no sense for style, the ship didn't even have a pool!"

The Doctor shock his head in disbelieve, but she could see the corners of his mouth twitch as he returned to the console. He pressed the speaker.

"Well, as it turns out, she refuses to go! I tried everything dear high commander but she just won't budge!"

River pressed a hand against her mouth to quiet her laughter and the Doctor shot her a little wink.

"Nonsense!" Commander Sho burst out. "Are you too weak to control your own womanhood? Hand her over immediately!"

The Doctor shook his head. "No."

"Well, then we take this as your answer." Sho gave them one last demonic smile before the screen faded with a sinister laughter to black.

* * *

"Sounds a little bit melodramatic, don't you think?" The Doctor gave her a quick look and River pursed her lips and shrugged, as suddenly another huge impact shock the TARDIS.

"Woah!" The Doctor tried to grab the console again, but this time it slipped his fingers and he was pushed back.

"Doctor!" River cried after him, but she could do nothing to help. He slipped down the floor and fell right against the merely leant doors.

River cursed under her breath and tried to secure her hold on the console. He had told her to close the stupid door!

The Doctor tried to hold on, but the TARDIS was still in motion and unfortunately another hit of the Sontaran battle force made the floor tilt even further and the Doctor fall backwards right into deep space.

"Doctor! Hold on!" River cried out for him, while she desperately tried working the console.

Oh Doctor, why did you switch the gravity normaliser off? She rolled her eyes and switched the lever back. Surely to impress one of his childlike companions. She hoped they at least had had some fun out of it.

Almost immediately the floor turned back to normal. River smiled pleased and calmly walked over to the wide open doors.

* * *

She peeked outside and could just make out the Doctor, who was clinging with the tip of his shoe onto the TARDIS door which was the only anchor that kept him from floating off into wide space.

River burst out laughing. "Hanging in there Doctor?" She asked him cheekily and gave a little wink.

"Oh shut up!" he called back and waved his long arms around in an effort to bring him closer to the security of the TARDIS.

"Hold on, I'll pull you back inside…" Unfortunately as she was saying this, the Sontaran fleet decided to attack once again and gave the TARDIS a wild turmoil that didn't affect the console room but had the Doctor loose his grip and drift off into space.

"Doctor!"

River didn't have much time to think. She pulled the little rope out of her belt and secured it on the console before she took two courageous steps and pushed herself out of the console room in one marvellous long jump.

River shot through the vacuum like a very dapper arrow and grabbed the Doctors hand before named one could drift even further off into space.

She sighed relived. "I've got you."

Quickly River wrapped her arms around his thin frame and hooked her arm with his to secure him from drifting off again, but he wouldn't stop struggling.

"Doctor! What are you doing?" She scolded him, as his wild movement made them drift even further from the security of the console room.

"My letter! I need it back!" He yelled at her, panting heavily while he tried to reach for the small folded paper that floated right in front of them, but slipped his long desperately searching fingers.

He looked at her, his dark eyes huge and bagging.

River gave him a disbelieving glance. Oh no, he wouldn't seriously ask her to…

"River, please" he took her hand and River knew she had no choice.

Oh, how she hated that man.

* * *

"Fine. I'll take you back to the TARDIS and go fetch your stupid letter!" While she said that she pressed a small button on her belt that made the rope recoil and pull them back towards the small blue police box.

The Doctor cried out in relief the moment his long legs touched the secure floor of his marvellous ship and gave the dark blue wood a passionate kiss.

River rolled her eyes. Well, at least she couldn't really blame him for loving the TARDIS over her… but for the letter…

She checked the rope again and gave him another look. But he just looked up to her with the same bagging puppy dog eyes and River gave in. She knew she would cross the universe for that man if he only happened to ask her too.

River quickly took her bag off to get rid of some weight and secured the robe around her waist.

With a small sigh she strongly pushed herself of the threshold of the TARDIS, eyes fixed on the small white dot the letter marked in the emptiness far ahead in front of her.

It was almost impossible to see by now, so far had it drifted off, but the name River Song wasn't whispered in awe across the stars for nothing.

Like a sparkling flash in silver dress River shot through space and snatched the thin paper between two fingers, her deep red nail polish was almost glooming in the faint starlight.

River smiled and spun around, as a sudden transport beam captured her frame and almost immediately her bum hit onto hard ground.

* * *

"You got to be kidding me."

Seemed like her husband had finally managed to catch up to her. River looked up and quickly pulled a face. Oh what was that smell?

She looked around and found herself crowded in bloody weaponry and dirty armour. The weapon chamber, really?

Men. They were all the same. Only a big headed Sontaran battle commander could transport his wife right into the weapon chamber of all places.

She got up and took a better look around the room. And almost smirked as she found what she was looking for.

River quickly walked over to the control panel hidden behind what looked like a Hujikun bazooka and hacked herself into the security system in three seconds flat. Some outdated technology.

She almost started chuckling as she ran her eyes over the pathetic defence system of the ship.

Unfortunately the door behind her slid open before River could finish her work and as she looked up, she found herself surrounded by at least a dozen of grim looking potato heads.

River pulled a face as she straightened up and checked her dress.

* * *

The Sontarans that all were a good head shorter than her in her dangerously shining red high heels parted their way to make some space for the biggest and ugliest of them all.

"Sho." She greeted him and tried her very best to give him a delightful smile. "It so good to see you again my darling."

"Womanhood, step forward!" The Sontaran Commander pointed a long stick at her and River rolled her eyes, but did as she was told. She didn't particularly fancy to be electrocuted on the spot.

"You escaped my ship." Sho started and narrowed his ugly eyes. "Under the law of Sonthar we are committed for life, you are not allowed to leave me."

"No, no, my darling. You got that wrong. I just wanted to take a quick stroll. You see, now I'm back and all yours."

River walked up to him and ran two fingers slowly up his armour before she softly stroke his ugly cheek, pressing herself against him.

To be honest, they never got to know each other well enough for River to know if moves like that worked on Sontarans, (or if Sontarans even used to dance at all) but during her many travels across the stars, River hadn't met any male that didn't respond to the same simple tricks.

No matter which planet, men are always the same.

Sho grinned a little bit and pulled her closer. He had to tilt his head back to look up at her, and River didn't even want to start to imagine the view he had of her from down there.

But she gave him a smile and softly ran a hand over his ugly bold head. At least it seemed to be working, if she could convince him that she would stay as his wife… maybe he would bring her back to her room from which she could teleport back to the TARDIS.

"Your foolish tricks don't work with me."

River blinked. "Sorry?" She pulled her hand back. But Sho didn't let his rough hands of her waist.

"We are married. You're my property. But you failed me. Now I will expose of you."

"What?!" River spun around but it was too late. At once about a dozen angry Sontarans raised their guns and pointed them directly at her, and River realised she left her bag and with that her trustful blaster in the TARDIS.

She cursed under her breath and quickly closed her eyes, as another beam of light surrounded her and she landed hard on her bum once more.

* * *

"For lords' sake could you lot make up your mind?" she cursed and rubbed her hurting backside.

"Hello honey" another voice greeted her. But this time it was no ugly grunt, actually it was very far from that.

"It was about time you showed up!" she scolded the Doctor, who held a hand out to help her up. "Where have you been?!"

She grabbed it and he pulled her upright.

"I was trying to pinpoint your location. Not easy between all those life forms, there's about two hundred of them on that ship alone!"

"Are you trying to tell me you couldn't manage to make out my position between a bunch of Sontarans?!"

River got up and stared at him in disbelieve. The Doctor grinned.

"Well you have to admit, you do look very much alike."

River scoffed and pushed him roughly to the side to walk up to the console. "Doctor, get me back. I had enough adventure for one day."

"But what about the Sontarans?" He asked in bewilderment. "We can't let them chase you across half the universe!"

"Don't worry about them" River told him and checked her lipstick. "I took care of them while I was there."

She put the lipstick back into her pocket and pressed a trigger hidden at its backside. In the distance the Sontaran fleet blow up in a large ball of fire.

The Doctor ran up to check the scanner and gave her a dismissing glance, but River ignored him and swayed her hair back.

* * *

"Well, it was nice seeing you again, Doctor." She turned to leave. "Oh yes, I had almost forgotten."

She turned back to him and handed him the still neatly folded paper. "Your letter."

"Thanks." The Doctor said and took it back.

"I sincerely hope you wife appreciates the effort it took to get that back."

"So do I" the Doctor admitted a little sheepishly. "Actually River" he walked up to her. "Would you mind doing me another favour?"

River turned to look at him. "Hm? What?" She gave him a look and raised her eyebrow at him.

"Well, I could need some help delivering that. Would you mind?" He handed it back to her.

River stared at him in disbelieve. "You are asking me to deliver your letter? To your wife?"

"It's not a big deal, just hand it over, it's just a matter of seconds really" He was already back working on the console. River watched him flabbergasted, her anger was starting to run wild in her stomach.

That-… how could he even dare to ask her that?!

She looked down at the letter again. Well, to be fair, she was a little bit curious who his mysterious wife could be. This might be her only chance to find out.

"Fine" she said finally. "But I'm not telling her it's from you, I'm just going to hand it to her without a word and disappear, understood?" She pointed a finger at him.

The Doctor grinned at her. "She will know who it is from, don't worry."

River rolled her eyes. Of course she will. She was probably waiting for that daft alien to finally pick her up for years and years, always dreaming, never daring to hope a wonderful man like him would actually love her back… well, maybe she was reading a bit too much into that.

* * *

"Here we are" the Doctor called out and secured the TARDIS. River looked at the door.

"I'm just going to give it to her and disappear right away" she gave him another look and started to type the coordinates of her cell in Stormcage into her vortex manipulator.

The Doctor walked up to her. "Fine with me."

"Good." She looked up to him again.

She wanted to kiss him, and at the same time she hated herself for that. Why did she even love him?

He looked at her expectantly. "Well then, I'll be going." River pointed at the door behind him.

"Yup" the Doctor nodded.

"Great. See you soon Doctor." River turned around, but before she could take more than two steps he grabbed her arm and spun her around.

River coughed surprised, but she was quieted as his soft cold lips pressed against hers. River tried not to moan, while she rolled her eyes back and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him closer.

But he broke the kiss all too sudden again, and River looked up at him with questioning eyes.

He smiled. "Goodbye River."

With that he walked off and left River more than dumbstruck. She cursed in all languages she could come up with on the spot, which to her disgrace weren't more than fifty two (that bloody alien and his bloody ability to snog her senseless!) while she stepped out the door… and blinked in surprise.

* * *

She was back in her cell.

River turned back to look at the TARDIS to check if she hadn't activated her vortex manipulator by accident. But the TARDIS was right there behind her and as she took another step forwards, the soft ancient moaning sounded through her cell again and the TARDIS disappeared with a soft breeze into nothingness.

River frowned a bit and looked at the letter she was still holding in her hands.

Her fingers were trembling a bit as she pulled it open.

She barked out a dry laugh.

It was a drawing. A really bad drawing. It showed a fish wearing some sort of party hat and toasting two glasses of champagne. Underneath it, it read:

"Happy Birthday, River. Love, The Doctor"

River smiled and pressed the little paper against her chest.

Oh, how she hated that alien.


End file.
